Wednesday, September 14, 2011


It's alive!

“It’s amazing how much success you have in the kitchen despite your dislike of measuring and numbers,” David remarked casually one afternoon.

“Yeah, well,” I replied, “It’s like Ms. Vu told me my last day of Chemistry class…”

“Wait…Who said what?”

If you had to ask me my favorite teacher in high school, it would have been Ms. Vu, my chemistry teacher. Despite my, shall we say, complete ineptitude for conversion factors, I still enjoyed the class. At least until I dropped it.

Ms. Vu was a feisty Vietnamese lady with a thick accent, and what she lacked for in height, she made up for in attitude. No one had names in her class. You were either addressed as simply “kid” or your element name, which you were required to pick on the first day (Fe, represent).

Between actual Chemistry lessons, she regaled us with stories of swiping her friend’s moped and driving it full tilt into a chain link fence, or diving into a giant tub of sprinkles at a certain national chain of donut shops in only her underwear. “I wanted to see what it would feel like.” She explained casually. I swear I’m not making this up.

One day, after a particularly bad week of quizzes which I barely passed, she pulled me aside and gazed at me levelly. “Iron.” She said gravely. “You will not pass. You need to drop this class. Drop Chemistry. Find something you like better.”

I was only too happy to agree after struggling through the latter half of the quarter. But Ms. Vu wasn’t finished.

Cocking her head to the side, she gave me an assessing look. “Kid, it’s OK Chemistry is not for you. You are one of those people who will either succeed in life….or fail. Miserably. Just...crash and burn!” She emphasized the last part. I nodded, filed that away, and much to my parent’s dismay, dropped Chemistry the next day.

it's better to burn out...than..well, you know.

I’ve found that Ms. Vu’s prediction carries over to this day. I make very few dishes in the kitchen, especially with baking, that are mediocre. What I turn out -- whether it is beer muffins, scones, 7-layer bars or coconut macaroons -- turns out spectacularly, or is pretty much a complete disaster (remember calling the fire department when I tried to make donuts?). Thankfully, this creation falls into the first category.

yo dawg, I heard you like cookies, so I put a cookie in your cookie so you could eat cookies while you were eating cookies

I took much of the work and risk out of the recipe by using a mixes, but this could also be done with your favorite cookie and brownie recipes made from scratch. The jumbo muffin tin isn’t absolutely necessary, it’s easier to make them with one. The bake time will vary depending on how large your muffin tin is, so make sure to keep an eye on the oven and check with toothpicks often.

*title courtesy of: 5chw4r7z


  1. inquiring minds are dying to know - does the Oreo stay crunchy or get soft when you bake it?

    I had deep fried Oreos once... I almost fell over right then and there from the sheer deliciousness of it all.

  2. Most baking snobs (myself included) are just jealous. These look fantastic.

  3. My parents had perfect timing visiting Cincinnati, that's for sure. My dad talked about the Frankencookie for the rest of the weekend.

  4. how long do you bake it for?

  5. We had Ms.Vu too!! I loved her pinky finger and had such a hard time in that class, but I loved her!


I try to be honest, fair and keep a good sense of humor in my posts--I would appreciate if you follow the same policy with your comments.